Insecure

Perhaps it's just me and my insecurities,
but I really don't think I can handle it anymore.

Everything seems nice and dandy on the surface.
But under the surface, I'm a total nervous wreck.

- - - - -

Do I need to do this? Or that?
Do I need to reciprocate certain things?
Do I need to take initiative for stuffs?
Do I? Need I? Must I? Should I?

- - - - -

I don't know how to date,
and I'm tired of the stupid dating rules and games.
I feel an invisible pressure.

Yet I can only smile & shake my head when G asks what's wrong.
The feel is torturing and it's eating me out.

It all vanishes into thin air the moment I get lost in his hugs,
but we're not going to live in hugs forever...

- - - - -

I think I'm gonna have to call this off.



Right after I finish up this little effort for his project.